There’s much to be said about masculinity, especially at a time when men are beginning to question and redefine what it means to be a man. Pasig-based author and TLDTD poetry journal co-founder Paolo Tiausas’ self-published poetry collection titled Lahat Ng Nag-Aangas Ay Inaagnas tackles the question of what it means to be a man who questions the preconceived notions of masculinity.
Published in October 2020, the collection of 37 poems takes readers into the perspective and thought process of a man who looks at the way things are, with a measure of disdain. Opening with “Pambungad Sa Angas,” Tiausas portrays stereotypical male angst, using action star Fernando “FPJ” Poe Jr. and billiards legend Efren “Bata” Reyes as examples; talking about how each of these notorious male legends possesses a certain “edge.” This particular poem is a strong starting point—literally. Pambungad Sa Angas delves into the culture of big egos and the need for “resbak,” with lines such as: “Biro lang kasi. Huwag kang makulit. / Lahat nareresbakan. Kailangang resbakan. / Pila sa FX, basketball, mamahaling alak. / Itataas ang boses at maghahanda ng kamao.”
Flashbacks
In an interview with The Benildean, Tiausas—who was awarded the 3rd Prize in the 2016 Carlos Palanca Memorial Awards for Literature under the Short Story Category Filipino Division for his piece titled “Cutter”—says that the poems within this collection are heavily inspired by events in his life.
“It feels like I’m rewriting my memories. It's such a liberating thing to be able to say that I recognize my mistakes and that I know I have sinned (not merely in the biblical sense) against the world. I want to keep repeating them until it also becomes palpable for other men like me,” he said.
After Pambungad Sa Angas, readers are taken into moments of introspection with poems such as “Cross-Examination,” and “Malakas at Maganda.” Tiausas weaves vividly-painted scenes with questions, observations and commentary. In “Hindi Karaniwan Ang Buhay,” he wrote “Kayang-kaya na magpatiwakal na lamang / sa kathang-buhay na wala ako doon, / sapagkat ano na bang naiambag ko / bukod sa sapilitang paglamon ng sitwasyon?”
A different approach to angst
Lahat Ng Nag-Aangas Ay Inaagnas is filled with large thoughts within small moments; taking seemingly mundane moments and interactions and extracting the stories within them. A number of the poems in this collection are told from the perspective of an observer, unable to look away as a moment of calm turns into a moment of impact. Two of these are “Paruparo Sa Mukha” and “Dalawang Sandali Ng Hiwaga Sa Aurora.”
“This effort to recall and reevaluate those instances that I previously thought were meaningless is the catalyst for many of the poems. Sometimes, I’d recall a memory first, then draw the poem out of that. Other times, the poem would appear out of something I’m currently seeing, and then the previous memories would just resurface to interact with the poem. There’s so much “personal reality” in these poems. I took so much from lived experience. In a way, I felt that [it] was doing justice to the poems.” Tiausas said.
Throughout the collection, the themes of masculinity and introspection are constant. However, the progression of these themes are interesting, as the collection begins with an impending implosion in Pambungad Sa Angas, and in contrast, ends with a note of resignation that resembles peace in “Ang Habambuhay Sa Mata Ng Bagyo.”
On masculinity, Tiausas says: “Part of the core of the book is the tension between presence and absence. Nag-aangas, to assert both arrogance and superiority, is to me an act of being present. It’s to announce: I am here, I am present. Inaagnas, on the other hand, is to fade, to be corrupted, to disappear. I would really prefer that men and masculinity recede into the background.”
Overall, Lahat Ng Nag-Aangas Ay Inaagnas is a halting, insightful look into the unconventional male view on masculinity.
A platform for self-published books
Lahat Ng Nag-Aangas Ay Inaagnas comes in three cover variations; one of which was designed by ID115 Multimedia Arts alumna, Thea Torres, and is available for purchase at UWU Books. From a single book, comes a platform for self-published authors. Tiausas explains how challenging it is to put yourself and your work out there, as a self-published author, which is how he started UWU Books—a passion project that aims to give local self-published authors a platform to showcase their work.
Lahat Ng Nag-Aangas Ay Inaagnas is available for purchase here.
